I have an Ipad Mini... just bought... my daughter typed in the wrong password too many times... now it hangs there and says ipad disabled connect to itunes... i followed everything on the internet ... holding the on/switch and home key togather until

See use of recovery mode in http://support.apple.com/kb/HT1212

Did you expand the section entitled, "If you have never synced your device with iTunes?" This is the section that describes Recovery Mode.

See Here > http://support.apple.com/kb/ht4097

You may need to try this More than Once...

Some users have reported that as many as 8 or 9 attempts were necessary before success...

Be sure to Follow ALL the Steps...

Pay particular attention to steps 3 and 4...

If you still have issues...

Then a Visit to an Apple Store or AASP (Authorized Apple Service Provider) is the Next Step...

Be sure to make an appointment first...

Make sure that you are performing the steps correctly. It can take a few tries to get it right.

• Disconnect the USB cable from the iPad, but leave the other end of the cable connected to your computer's USB port.
• Turn off iPad: Press and hold the Sleep/Wake button for a few seconds until the red slider appears, then slide the slider. Wait for iPad to turn off.
• If you cannot turn off iPad using the slider, press and hold the Sleep/Wake and Home buttons at the same time. When the iPad turns off, release the Sleep/Wake and Home buttons.
• While pressing and holding the Home button, reconnect the USB cable to iPad. When you reconnect the USB cable, iPad should power on.
• Continue holding the Home button until you see the "Connect to iTunes" screen. When this screen appears you can release the Home button.
• If necessary, open iTunes. You should see the recovery mode alert that iTunes has detected an iPad in recovery mode.
• Use iTunes to restore iPad.

1. Turn off iPad

2. Connect USB cable to computer; leave the other end alone

3. Press and hold the Home button down and connect the docking end of cable to iPad

4. Continue holding the Home button until you see the "Connect To iTune" screen

5. Release the Home button

6. Open iTune

7. You should see "iTunes has detected an iPad in recovery mode"

8. Use iTune to restore iPad

Note: You need to be patient and repeat the above many times. Got this from another discussion

https://discussions.apple.com/thread/4452544?start=0&tstart=0

The people here are only trying to help you. Maybe you should just seek help at am Apple Store, if you can't get it to work for you.

When you get the iPad up and running again, maybe you shouldn't let your daughter type a Passcode that she cannot remember.

When Recovery Mode is entered correctly neither the iPad nor iTunes should say anything about the passcode. We'd be happy to help, but you're going to have to work with us.

Now, let me try to explain it another way:

First, turn the iPad off if it isn't already. Next, hold down the home button (below the screen). Continue to hold the button when you plug in the iPad to the computer, which should power it on. Do not release until the iPad displays a "Connect to iTunes" screen. Then follow the prompts in iTunes. It should say it detected a device in Recovery Mode.

Actually, a 12 year old is quite capable of using the iPad.