how do I un-disable my iPhone if it says connect to iTunes but iTunes says that it can't access iPhone because there is a passcode set.

My iPhone has been disabled, and when I turn it on it displays the message: iPhone is disabled/connect to iTunes. When I connect to iTunes I get the message: Cannot connect to IPhone because a passcode has been set. The passcode entry screen does not come up. We have attempted to reset the phone with lo luck. can someone help me.