Remote Management user keeps disappearing

I have also experienced this with Sonoma on Apple Silicone. What I have determined is that if you start with Ventura installed and set up ARD with "Only these users" then upgrade to Sonoma, the users stick. If you try to configure ARD with a fresh install of Sonoma the "Only these users" don't stick. So on a brand new M3 Mac with Sonoma pre-installed I wipe the Mac, install Ventura, configure ARD, then I upgrade to Sonoma. First and 2nd Apple Support tiers had not seen it before.

We have the exact same issue with Mac OS Sonoma. Our "Administrator" local user will disappear from Remote Management rendering Apple Remote Desktop useless. When manually enabling Remote Management or using an MDM configuration profile, the problem persists. We can confirm that the problem only exists on systems that are not upgraded to Sonoma. Systems that were upgraded seem to work just fine. I also want to mention that this is an issue even after a fresh wipe and install. We are contacting Apple Support today.

I just got this to work on a brand new MacBook Air M3. I'm sorry but I don't have the exact steps I did but it stuck. I am going to be testing agin to see if I can repeat the steps I took to get it to work. I did something like enabling all the permissions, clicking okay, quitting Settings, then going back in and adding a user while still under the Any user then back out and back in then adding Only these users, etc. Posting this so that maybe others can also be testing to help figure it out.

Clicking on "Me too" gives a spinning circle which never stops spinning ...

So I am leaving comment here that I have a similar problem : worked OK, with "All Users", then I added an individual User, now I cannot switch back to "All anymore", or adding more Users also does not work :-(

When is apple going to fix this godddamn problem?

We loaded up a M2 MacBook and it worked so I went back to Macs and mac mini M3s and still ran into the same issue. I am going to try another laptop and see what happens.