Lilia2

Q: Parental controls/time restrictions on iPhone

I can safely say that my daughter's iPhone has ruined our lives.  We've had it for five days.  Yes, there are some built-in parental controls, but Apple has blocked anybody from offering a software program that will turn the dang thing off (I'm talking about texting and calling) at a certain time every night.  I have a daughter who is addicted to her phone and the battles are humongous to get her to do anything but text. 

 

There are plenty of good programs with good parental controls for the Android and Blackberry, but thanks Apple for not allowing us as parents to turn the phone off at night.  I know about Mobicip, which is a great company, but they can only turn the internet off, not texting or calling.  When you have a kid who can and will text 5,000 texts a month, we need something that eliminates the battles at home and can automatically turn the thing off when it's bedtime.  We're all losing sleep.  Most parents, when they get an iPhone for their kid, don't realize that Apple, unlike Android, has chosen to place more importance on children's privacy than parent's ability to place restrictions on their kids' phones.  I plan to take the iPhone back and get her an Android.

iPhone 4S, iOS 4.3.3, Time restrictions?

Posted on Mar 27, 2012 7:49 AM

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Q: Parental controls/time restrictions on iPhone

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  • by Michigander36,

    Michigander36 Michigander36 Jul 30, 2012 7:36 PM in response to Tawnii
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Jul 30, 2012 7:36 PM in response to Tawnii

    OK,  one more time for you slow people;

     

    <y daughter has an iphone 3GS.  She has a 200MB Data Plan.  I had put the smart limits on her phone after she went over her 200MB data plan.  Teo montsh later,  she went over her data limit again,  which confused me because I had the Smart Limits in place configured and turned on.  I called AT&T.  The Customer Service Rep,  was confused as to why it was not working and lowered the threshhold to 199 MB.  One Monthe Later,  and Bam,  she went over again,  which was at the end of a billing cycle and four days later,  yet again,  she went over.  Now I know you want to correct me,  but the smart limits are supposed to shut off her data so she cannot go over her limits.  So I calle AT&Ta dn talked to a customer service rep.  She told me that

  • by sfx3200,

    sfx3200 sfx3200 Jul 30, 2012 7:47 PM in response to Michigander36
    Level 1 (40 points)
    Jul 30, 2012 7:47 PM in response to Michigander36

    So... When I say "Smart Limits can still set time restrictions and block numbers," you give us a story in which Smart Limits failed to restrict data use over the course of a month. Ok, not all features of Smart Lines work, got it, but it can still set time restrictions and block numbers, which is what was requested by the OP.

  • by Michigander36,

    Michigander36 Michigander36 Jul 30, 2012 7:58 PM in response to Michigander36
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Jul 30, 2012 7:58 PM in response to Michigander36

    AT&T Cut me off.  Entire post below.

     

    OK, one more time for you slow people;

     

    My daughter has an iphone 3GS. She has a 200MB Data Plan. I had put the smart limits on her phone after she went over her 200MB data plan. Two months later, she went over her data limit again, which confused me because I had the Smart Limits in place configured and turned on. I called AT&T. The Customer Service Rep, was confused as to why it was not working and lowered the threshold to 199 MB. One Month Later, and Bam! she went over again, which was at the end of a billing cycle and four days later, yet again, she went over. Now I know you want to correct me, but the smart limits are supposed to shut off her data so she cannot go over her limits. So I called AT&T and talked to a customer service rep. She told me that Smart Limits does not stop the data and cannot prevent her from going over her minutes. I hung up, called back and asked to speak to a Tech Support Person, who confirmed that Smart Limits does NOT work on an iPhone with ios 3.0 or later. As it did not work for me, I am inclined to believe them.

     

    As for my parenting skills. That would be none of your business. However, if my daughter were watching videos of smosh after her homework and chores were done or sending some photos to her friends and the smart limits did not halt her data usage before she went over her limit. Then that make me a bad parent.

    So my solution to this whole issue?

     

    1. Stop replying to idiots on this site.
    2. Cancelling my AT&T Plan for all three Data and Money sucking iPhones in our family plan, and just go with a land line.

     

     

    The iPhones can still be used like and iPod and do text messages as long as we are connected to my new home netork.

  • by Michigander36,

    Michigander36 Michigander36 Jul 30, 2012 8:09 PM in response to sfx3200
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Jul 30, 2012 8:09 PM in response to sfx3200

    Last time.  I promise!,

     

     

    You are correct,  the time limits did actually work,. No texting after 8:00 PM until 1500, when she got home from school. But it did not and cannot according to AT&T Stop the data usage or prevent going over data limis that you can set up in the Samrt limits.  That is all i was attempting to insert in the conversation.

  • by sfx3200,

    sfx3200 sfx3200 Jul 30, 2012 8:47 PM in response to Michigander36
    Level 1 (40 points)
    Jul 30, 2012 8:47 PM in response to Michigander36

    I apologize for the misunderstanding then, it was my impression that the time restrictions could cut off the phone entirely, MMS and Data. Clearly, if data can still be used throughout the time restrictions it poses problems because of iMessage, Facebook Chat, Skype, etc. I am surprised time restrictions do not cut off everything...

     

    I did not question or implicate anyone's parenting skills in this thread. To those that do, I think there are far more troubling oversights of parents than late night cell phone use.

     

    Perhaps with the release of iOS6 coming soon, new parental controls will be implemented. I know there will be new "Do Not Disturb" features but that probably does not have a lock.

  • by WantToRestrictDataUsage,

    WantToRestrictDataUsage WantToRestrictDataUsage Aug 8, 2012 5:23 AM in response to Michigander36
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Aug 8, 2012 5:23 AM in response to Michigander36

    You are right. I should read your post earlier. In fact, I found the same statement in e-mail confirmation and At & t should put it on their webpage to save me some time! Btw, I canceled this feature immediately.

  • by Laurakcb,

    Laurakcb Laurakcb Aug 8, 2012 7:28 AM in response to WantToRestrictDataUsage
    Level 1 (5 points)
    Aug 8, 2012 7:28 AM in response to WantToRestrictDataUsage

    Just as an FYI--there are some iPhone apps that will lock the phone for certain amounts of time or on a schedule. I can't remember what they are but I ran across them when I was searching a few months back for a parental control app. I don't remember if it turns the phone off completely or just locks it but it's done with a code similar to the way the parental controls on the iphone are accessed with a code.

  • by KiltedTim,

    KiltedTim KiltedTim Aug 8, 2012 7:32 AM in response to Laurakcb
    Level 9 (56,349 points)
    Mac OS X
    Aug 8, 2012 7:32 AM in response to Laurakcb

    There are no such apps for non jailbroken iPhones.

  • by Laurakcb,

    Laurakcb Laurakcb Aug 8, 2012 8:19 AM in response to KiltedTim
    Level 1 (5 points)
    Aug 8, 2012 8:19 AM in response to KiltedTim

    Well, my bad then. Thought that was what I found when searching for something else.

  • by BiLL.Solomon,

    BiLL.Solomon BiLL.Solomon Sep 4, 2012 8:52 AM in response to Lilia2
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 4, 2012 8:52 AM in response to Lilia2

    AT&T SmartLimit works on my Daughter iPhone 4S.  It has full control, over texting and calling.  I also put restrictions on installing apps so she can't download texting apps.  Also it will be best to disable icloud, to avoide imessage.

  • by kgreen1970,

    kgreen1970 kgreen1970 Sep 17, 2012 9:37 AM in response to Lilia2
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 17, 2012 9:37 AM in response to Lilia2

    I'm not sure that it works yet, but through AT&T I disabled data access for the rest of the month on my daughter's line.  It says that this will prevent any data usage in places where there is no wi-fi (we turn wi-fi off at night at our house).  When we have used Smart Limits on this iphone in the past it hasn't worked, but I'm trying it again to see if it will.  She has an iPhone 4. 

     

    To all the Parenting Experts on this forum: removing opportunities for engaging in undesirable behaviors, (such as staying up all night texting and watching videos) is part of any sound parenting strategy.  To be able to remove this temptation without having to physically wrest the phone from the child, or engage in hand-to-hand combat, or threaten consequences that will require even more conflict and more use of force ... well, that's a totally reasonable thing to want. 

     

    And yes I DO rue the day that I bought my child a Nintendo DS, however many years ago, and, too, the day I bought her an iPhone.  If I knew then what I know now I wouldn't have done either of those things (and in fact we'd live in a cave far far from Western civilization).  But now it is here and if I can succesfully set limits through technology, that would save me a lot of parenting headache. 

  • by Palineberry,

    Palineberry Palineberry Sep 20, 2012 10:29 AM in response to mnthomp
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 20, 2012 10:29 AM in response to mnthomp

    What kind of wireless router do you have? I currently have to turn the whole router off (manually) each night which is a bummer for me if I want to watch Netflix or Hulu after he goes to bed.  I'd LOVE to just turn off his access to it if that's possible! Do tell!

  • by kgreen1970,

    kgreen1970 kgreen1970 Sep 20, 2012 11:45 AM in response to Palineberry
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 20, 2012 11:45 AM in response to Palineberry

    We have been disconnecting internet for the whole house, and yes it is a bummer.  It turns out AT&T's "Smart Limits" block texts and calls, but not her access to the internet.  So I am back to disabling the data plan on her account, which AT&T makes pretty easy to do.  

  • by Vakerue,

    Vakerue Vakerue Sep 21, 2012 9:59 AM in response to Lilia2
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 21, 2012 9:59 AM in response to Lilia2

    At the risk of getting unfairly attacked on this forum for my parenting skills, I would like to add that I am truly disappointed that the new iOS doesn't include parental controls for texting.  I was so naively hopeful.  My request is simple: I would like to have the option to turn off texting completely.

     

    From the beginning I used AT &amp; T Smart Limits, in fact, it was because of this service that I felt comfortable letting my son purchase an iPhone. At first it seemed to work well.  I limited the number of text messages he could send/receive so that we would not lose him completely to his peer group. I limited the hours of day he could text &amp; make calls. And I limited his data usage.  I also shut off Safari and replaced it with the K-9 Browser (which sadly, is fairly useless, so he didn't use it). All of it seemed to work well...until he found workarounds, like iMessage (which cannot be controlled by AT&amp;T) and Facebook.  This did not make me happy, but it wasn't yet a deal breaker.

     

    And then came difficulties with peers at school.  I believe his principal said it best: "unlike when we were growing up and we'd had a bad day, we could go home and get a break from it.  With today's technology, as great as it is, these kids don't get that break."  Sorting out how to not be the "bad guy" as a parent in this situation (for strategically removing his access to these communication tools) was complicated to say the least.  And then there was the sexting and the just general "stupid things kids say to each other in text messages" that they would never say in person or even on the phone.  It went from bad to worse.  And we suddenly had a son who was sad and lonely and wouldn't communicate with us anymore.  It was rough for several months.

     

    So where are we now? He has a new phone. A $40 Samsung flip phone with no texting, no bells, no whistles. His iPhone, for all intents and purposes, has been turned into an iPod Touch, except that he also doesn't currently have wireless access (thank you iMessage! Urg!) and the phone can't leave the house. The results? He is happy. He has friends. He has a great girlfriend. He's doing well in school and his other endeavors.  And, most importantly, he talks to us again, let's us in on his struggles and his successes, and let's us provide support when he needs it  Does he love his new phone? Is he happy with us for downgrading his iPhone?  Absolutely not.  This is why I was so hopeful that today I would be able to return his iPhone to it's former glory, shut off the texting app, and give it back to him (and toss the Samsung).  I hadn't planned to ban him from texting for life (or rather until age 18), just until we felt he was on solid ground with friends and he'd developed some better communication skills in the real world before launching him back into the twisted world of texting.  (Plus-there would always be the simple safety net of shutting it off again if there we problems.)

     

    But alas, it was not to be. 

     

    I understand that it is not Apple's responsibility to assist me in parenting my son, but they certainly have profited from the teenage market.  And if I could do it over, I never would have let my son save up and buy himself an iPhone.  And, needless to say, my younger son already knows that unless Apple does develop better parental controls for the iPhone (and iPodTouch, by the way), he will not be able to buy an iPhone (or iPod Touch) for himself until he is much older.  I guess it seems it would be in Apple's best interest to help to provide texting restriction options to parents to hold on to this market.

  • by bevitore,

    bevitore bevitore Sep 27, 2012 5:54 AM in response to Lilia2
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 27, 2012 5:54 AM in response to Lilia2

    Lilia2~

     

    As a fellow parent I have only one word - pathetic.

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