Q: AOL Username to Apple ID

You will have to create a new iTunes id, you can't merge it with an existing account.

I've been trying to find the on screen instructions and can't find them, but I see that you say we must create a new account, that's easy, then how do I transfer everything to the new account? thks in advance

According to Convert your AOL Username to an Apple ID - Apple Support you should be prompted to create an account when logging into the AOL id via your computer's iTunes (Store > View Account menu option) :

To convert your AOL Username to an Apple ID, sign in to iTunes on a Mac or PC with your AOL Username. Then follow the on-screen instructions.

You don't create a new iTunes account outside of that using the usual create process, you will not be able to transfer your AOL id content to it if you do so (you can't merge accounts or transfer content to a different account)

A workaround you might consider trying to maintain access to all your purchases from multiple Apple IDs is to setup Family Sharing. Add each Apple ID you have and then you can share most iTunes Store purchases between the Apple IDs. Going forward, just begin making purchases on your new Apple ID and use that new Apple ID for all future services like iMessage and FaceTime, etc...

I'm not prompted and I've had my AOL email address as my iTunes log-in since iTunes was released in 2003.

Is it an AOL email address that is your id or an AOL username ? As far as I know it's only usernames that are affected

Apple required that I use an email address when I created my iTunes Music Store account, so I used my AOL address since I've had it for over 20 years (I'm an AOL "Charter Member", probably the last one!).

You shouldn't be affected if you are using an AOL email address as your account id, it's only people using AOL usernames (which doesn't contain the '@aol.com') that need to change their accounts

How were they able to get around Apple's "Apple ID must be an email address" requirement?

There was an agreement between AOL and Apple back in 2003, which included being able to use AOL usernames (screen names) to access the iTunes store : http://www.apple.com/pr/library/2003/12/18AOL-Members-Now-Have-Instant-Access-to -Apples-iTunes-Music-Store.html

“AOL members can now conveniently use their AOL screen names and passwords to log onto the iTunes Music Store and use their AOL Wallet or card-on-file to immediately purchase and download songs."

Ah, I see. I must have already created my iTunes Music Store account, then.

So if my Apple ID is "Username@aol.com" I am still ok ? But if it is just "username" I need to change it.
Hopefully starting the obvious

I, too, am using my AOL email address (with the "@aol.com"), not my AOL screen name (which does not have the "@aol.com") as my Apple ID so I hope you are correct.  What concerns me is that Apple sent me the warning email stating: "Our records indicate that you have been using your AOL Username to sign in to the iTunes Store, App Store, or iBooks Store".  Also, when I sign in with my Apple ID I am not getting prompted to change anything.  Some more clarity would be helpful.  Thanks!

I've got both an AOL "username" and "username@aol.com", the later being a valid Apple ID that seems to be good at all stores in the Apple-verse, while the AOL "username" account is only good at iTunes store because a third party cyber-squatted that "username" back in the mobileme.com era.

Both of those accounts have a cash balance due to gift cards.

So, I can't just add @aol.com to my "username" because it's already in use by me.

Anyway, is Apple telling me I need to come up with a new email address to create a new Apple ID? Because all the stuff I've seen about creating an Apple ID says it's got to be valid email address.

I am loath to create a new email address.