Lilia2

Q: Parental controls/time restrictions on iPhone

I can safely say that my daughter's iPhone has ruined our lives.  We've had it for five days.  Yes, there are some built-in parental controls, but Apple has blocked anybody from offering a software program that will turn the dang thing off (I'm talking about texting and calling) at a certain time every night.  I have a daughter who is addicted to her phone and the battles are humongous to get her to do anything but text. 

 

There are plenty of good programs with good parental controls for the Android and Blackberry, but thanks Apple for not allowing us as parents to turn the phone off at night.  I know about Mobicip, which is a great company, but they can only turn the internet off, not texting or calling.  When you have a kid who can and will text 5,000 texts a month, we need something that eliminates the battles at home and can automatically turn the thing off when it's bedtime.  We're all losing sleep.  Most parents, when they get an iPhone for their kid, don't realize that Apple, unlike Android, has chosen to place more importance on children's privacy than parent's ability to place restrictions on their kids' phones.  I plan to take the iPhone back and get her an Android.

iPhone 4S, iOS 4.3.3, Time restrictions?

Posted on Mar 27, 2012 7:49 AM

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Q: Parental controls/time restrictions on iPhone

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  • by Gabonvikar,

    Gabonvikar Gabonvikar Aug 12, 2015 3:44 PM in response to Meg St._Clair
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Aug 12, 2015 3:44 PM in response to Meg St._Clair

    Thanks for the support. It's just a tough topic. She's smart and sweet but strong willed and tempered about what's important to her. Trying not to be a bad guy in this but also trying to be the kind of parent that sets rules and consequences and follows through. She however, despite being grounded from the phone and other electronics because of repeated incursions from her room well after bed time to try to find where I've hidden her phone, continues to force my hand and there are only so many privileges you can take away before you realize you're in a corner. Talking doesn't do much, scolding does less so I was just hoping to find a solution that made her efforts fruitless. I've taken the phone away and kept it for days now and set performance benchmarks she must meet in order to get it back and it seems she'd rather just break the rules and get a minute here and there when she can find the phone and get in trouble rather than working toward behaving appropriately and earning the privilege back.

     

    This has become much less about the phone and more about my child so I'll stop here. Guess I'll just set a password for accessing the phone any time I don't feel like trying to hide it.

     

    Ugh.

  • by Meg St._Clair,

    Meg St._Clair Meg St._Clair Aug 12, 2015 9:03 PM in response to Gabonvikar
    Level 9 (59,537 points)
    iPhone
    Aug 12, 2015 9:03 PM in response to Gabonvikar

    I don't envy you. But, I'd give some serious thought to a basic phone.

     

    Best of luck.

  • by jejones75,

    jejones75 jejones75 Sep 4, 2015 9:42 AM in response to david204
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 4, 2015 9:42 AM in response to david204

    In spending literally hours researching the same problem (Verizon's FamilyBase restrictions aren't honoring the time restrictions I put in place --> it's because of iMessage --> ok, then how do I disable iMessage so son can't just toggle it back on?)...this quick post is exactly what I needed, it took me 20 seconds to implement, and viola, I'm a happy(ier) Mom...so thank you!

  • by ZikzakCorp,

    ZikzakCorp ZikzakCorp Sep 4, 2015 1:20 PM in response to jejones75
    Level 4 (1,038 points)
    iPhone
    Sep 4, 2015 1:20 PM in response to jejones75

    Glad this resolved it for you, and glad you understand the boundaries of the device. As you can see, there are tools to manage various features of the iPhone in a lot of ways. But people looking for Apple to give them the ability to shut down the phone are basically looking for the digital equivalent of taking the phone away. Which is, I would think, harder than just physically taking the phone away.

  • by hiphiphorray,

    hiphiphorray hiphiphorray Sep 8, 2015 3:02 PM in response to Lilia2
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 8, 2015 3:02 PM in response to Lilia2

    Lilia2,

    I have the same issue with my daughter.  I'm trying to get AT&T to limit the number of texts allowed on my daughter's account, but it is very difficult.  Don't let any of these ignorant people tell you how to parent.  I'm sure you're doing your best.  My wife is at her wits end trying to deal with our daughter, so I know what you are going through.  I can't believe there isn't just a parental control that allows some limits on the phone.  We have taken advantage of some of them, but cannot figure out how to limit texts.  I don't want to eliminate them - I want to be able to communicate with my daughter, I just don't want her to spend her life on the phone texting.

  • by Meg St._Clair,

    Meg St._Clair Meg St._Clair Sep 8, 2015 3:18 PM in response to hiphiphorray
    Level 9 (59,537 points)
    iPhone
    Sep 8, 2015 3:18 PM in response to hiphiphorray

    hiphiphorray wrote:

     

      I can't believe there isn't just a parental control that allows some limits on the phone. 

    The only parental control to limit texts on the iPhone is for parent to remove phone from child when parent deems the limit has been reached.

  • by hiphiphorray,

    hiphiphorray hiphiphorray Sep 8, 2015 6:11 PM in response to Meg St._Clair
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Sep 8, 2015 6:11 PM in response to Meg St._Clair

    Thanks Captain Obvious.  You are wonderful!

  • by Meg St._Clair,

    Meg St._Clair Meg St._Clair Sep 8, 2015 6:45 PM in response to hiphiphorray
    Level 9 (59,537 points)
    iPhone
    Sep 8, 2015 6:45 PM in response to hiphiphorray

    hiphiphorray wrote:

     

    Thanks Captain Obvious.  You are wonderful!

    That would be Admiral Obvious! But, you're welcome.

  • by chattphotos,

    chattphotos chattphotos Sep 8, 2015 9:07 PM in response to hiphiphorray
    Level 4 (2,442 points)
    Desktops
    Sep 8, 2015 9:07 PM in response to hiphiphorray

    hiphiphorray wrote:

     

    Thanks Captain Obvious.  You are wonderful!

     

    Glad to be of service!

     

    hotels_2.png

  • by croffey,

    croffey croffey Oct 11, 2015 10:19 PM in response to Lilia2
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Oct 11, 2015 10:19 PM in response to Lilia2

    This solution may have already been offered, but if the issue is the need to prevent the ability to call/text then I can tell you what I did to solve the problem with my teens.

    1. Right now, they're using iPhone 5Ss on iOS 9, but the same solution has been in place since they had iPhone 4s.
    2. We're on AT&T for wireless and Verizon for Internet, though the same solution was in place when we were on Comcast Xfinity.
      1. I signed up for smart limits and set several time limits including school time restrictions and bed time restrictions.
        1. This shuts off AT&Ts data network during the restricted hours except for "allowed numbers" defined by me. I include only other family member's numbers as allowed numbers. (911 is always available)
          1. If the phone is on your wifi network, these restrictions alone will do little to solve the problem, but in combination with the next step, is very effective
      2. In my router, both on xfinity and Verizon, I have the ability via parental controls to disable the wifi on devices in my network during time periods defined by me. I have set the wifi to be disabled at the same times as the AT&T data plan.
        1. This, combined with the smart limits, effectively turns the phone into a disconnected iPod Touch during the restriction periods.
        2. Of course, if they go somewhere where there is public wifi, my home network restrictions won't apply until they get home, but home is where the problem exists so I'm ok with that.
    3. As a result, I don't have to take the phones away from my kids, and I maintain control of their ability to connect. Another advantage is that when they get grounded, or any other time I choose, I can make the restrictions "all day" and they have no contact for the duration of their punishment, but still have access to their music so they can listen to depressing music and lament internally about how unfair life is.

    The only remaining issue I have is that some/many gaming apps don't require a connection to function, so they could still play games while disconnected, but neither of them uses the phone for gaming very much so I can live with that.

  • by lutef1sk,

    lutef1sk lutef1sk Nov 19, 2015 5:24 PM in response to Rohit Prakash
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Nov 19, 2015 5:24 PM in response to Rohit Prakash

    A-freaking men.

  • by rayleeus,

    rayleeus rayleeus Nov 26, 2015 4:34 PM in response to croffey
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Nov 26, 2015 4:34 PM in response to croffey

    Thank you! I will try this. This is actually helpful!

     

    Regarding the unhelpful parent-bashers, it is beyond inconceivable to me that on this technical issue forum we encounter an army of holier-than-thou trolls who feel the need to use this as a parenting forum--with the most hostile comments obviously coming from people that have never had kids. This is not rocket science. We want a solution. Apple could offer a solution if they were so inclined. They don't have it yet.  Many parents want their kids to make use of the great features Apple does have, and not give them a lesser quality phone just because of their lack of concern for parents' features that have been requested by parents for years now. Note that many of these features we want for the iPhone are ALREADY features that have been in the Mac operating system for years. Of course, many of the operating system features are not up to the iPhone restriction standards yet either, so there is a lot of inconsistency between their own products. None of these inconsistencies, believe it or not, has ANYTHING to do with any particular user's lack of character in being a parent.  A lot of people on this thread need to learn some manners. People look to these forums to get technical help on technical issues, not to be bashed for their character because of some completely unfounded implications.

     

    <Edited by Host>

  • by Meg St._Clair,

    Meg St._Clair Meg St._Clair Nov 26, 2015 4:23 PM in response to rayleeus
    Level 9 (59,537 points)
    iPhone
    Nov 26, 2015 4:23 PM in response to rayleeus

    rayleeus wrote:

    A lot of people on this thread need to learn some manners and just keep their condescending....

    Would those good manners include refraining from profanity and ad hominem attacks?

  • by Ferone,

    Ferone Ferone Nov 29, 2015 11:44 AM in response to KiltedTim
    Level 1 (0 points)
    Nov 29, 2015 11:44 AM in response to KiltedTim

    ttrue re: all above.  AT&T smart Limits allows you to restrict specific times, texts, and data, but it does not block chat apps (WeChat, Viber, Kik, line, FB, SnapChat, Instagram, etc. which allows you to chat ....basically texting.  Smart Limits allows you to block data - which also blocks these sites. 

    AT&T is a great app  should you have wifi in the house (which most do) "they won't need data" to chat or even talk/call (free talk apps) with friends. 

    IT kinda ***** for parents whose kids are constantly on these things (and most kids are) ...you can take away their mobile but if their is an iPod, Ipad, but with wifi mobile Parent controls such as AT&T won't work.

     

    Now I did just find out that wifi providers such as Verizon and AT&T do allow you to control the wifi, restricting specific devices at certain times of the day or completely. 

  • by Meg St._Clair,

    Meg St._Clair Meg St._Clair Nov 29, 2015 2:02 PM in response to Ferone
    Level 9 (59,537 points)
    iPhone
    Nov 29, 2015 2:02 PM in response to Ferone

    Ferone wrote:

     

    ttrue re: all above.  AT&T smart Limits allows you to restrict specific times, texts, and data, but it does not block chat apps (WeChat, Viber, Kik, line, FB, SnapChat, Instagram, etc. which allows you to chat ....basically texting.  Smart Limits allows you to block data - which also blocks these sites. 

    Remove those apps from the phone and set the restrictions to prevent downloading of apps.

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