Q: My pictures have been deleted from all my devices and iCloud

If you have a new MacBook Pro you are probably using Photos rather than the older iPhoto. If you have iCloud Photo Library turned on then any photo that you delete from the phone is also deleted from iCloud and from any device (e.g., MacBook Pro Photos) connected to that iCloud Photo Library. A warning to that effect is given each time you delete. If the deletions were recent (approximately 30 days) they may be in the Recently Deleted folder on the devices and  at https://www.icloud.com/ (in the Photos app there).

Undowen1 wrote:

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however I do not want them to be deleted from iCloud and Photos unless I ask for it...

 

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That's not an option with iCloud Photo Library -- it is designed to have all of your photos on your devices and on iCloud -- any additions or deletions are made everywhere automatically. You can reduce the space required on the phone by turning on Settings > iCloud > Photos > Optimize iPhone Storage.

You can completely turn off iCloud Photo Library on your phone via Settings > iCloud > Photos. On your Mac, open the Photos app and then Preferences and click iCloud at the top of the Preferences window.

Instructions for turning iCloud Photo Library off are in this article - Get help with your iCloud Photo Library - Apple Support

however I do not want them to be deleted from iCloud and Photos unless I ask for it...

With ICPL when you delete a photos on any device you are asking for it to be deleted on every device - the entire purpose of ICPL is to keep libraries on multiple devices exactly the same - all additions, deletion and edits made on any device and made every place  - the is the way ICLP is  documented and works - if that is not what you want then you need to use a different work flow

additional information is here - iCloud Photo Library FAQ - Apple Support

LN

How can I turn off iCloud Photo Library

User léonie posted the following in another topic.  It will help you to stop using the iCloud Photo Library:

léonie:  stop using icloud Photo Library and get all orignal files on Mac

Proceed, like described on this Help page:   https://help.apple.com/photos/mac/1.0/?lang=en#/phtf5e48489c

 

Basically, enable “Download Originals to this Mac” in your iCloud Preferences, and wait, untill all photos have been downloaded to your Photos Library.  Then copy your Photos LIbrary to your external drive.  The external drive needs to be formatted "MacOS Extended (Journaled).

Now delete all photos in your original Photos library, empty the "Recently deleted" album, wait, until all photos have been deleted from the iCloud photo Library.  Then disable iCloud Photo library as described below.

Stop using iCloud Photo Library

Important: If you decide to turn off iCloud Photo Library, first be sure to select “Download Originals to this Mac” in the iCloud pane of Photos preferences, so all your original photos can be downloaded from iCloud to your Mac. Be sure to allow time for your originals to download before turning off iCloud Photo Library completely.

• Choose Photos > Preferences, then click iCloud. 
• Deselect the iCloud Photo Library checkbox to turn it off.

After you turn off iCloud Photo Library, the Photos app on your Mac can’t access your iCloud library, and any edits you make to photos on your Mac won’t appear on your other devices. Your library remains in iCloud and available to other devices that use iCloud Photo Library. To turn off iCloud Photo Library on all your devices, open the iCloud pane of System Preferences, click the Manage button, then click Photo Library. Click “Disable and delete.” Your photos and videos will be deleted from iCloud Photo Library in 30 days, unless you click Undo Delete before that time.