Q: I cant get on my phone. It doesnt stay in recovery mode long enough to update so unsure of what to do?

Hi jentryrogers1522,

I understand you've forgotten the passcode to your iPhone, and you are having some difficulties when trying to restore it with recovery mode. I know that it's important to have access to your iPhone, so I'm happy to provide some direction to help with this.

When using recovery mode, if the iPhone sits for 15 minutes or more without any changes, it will automatically reboot. This will require you to perform a few steps again if this happens. Note that if it reboots, the download for the software should continue in the background. This means that you are on the right track, but may just need to put it into recovery mode again to resolve the issue. You can see more about this here:

If you forgot the passcode for your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch, or your device is disabled - Apple Support

Erase your device with recovery mode

If you've never synced with iTunes or set up Find My iPhone in iCloud, you'll need to use recovery mode to restore your device. This will erase the device and its passcode.

1. Connect your iOS device to your computer and open iTunes. If you don't have a computer, borrow one from a friend, or go to an Apple Retail Store or Apple Authorized Service Provider. 
2. While your device is connected, force restart it: Press and hold the Sleep/Wake and Home buttons at the same time. Don't let go when you see the Apple logo — keep holding until you see the recovery mode screen.
   
3. When you see the option to Restore or Update, choose Restore. 
   
   iTunes will download software for your device. If it takes more than 15 minutes, your device will exit recovery mode and you'll need to repeat steps 2 and 3.
    
4. Wait for the process to finish. Then you can set up and use your device.

Have a great rest of your day, and thanks for using the Apple Support Communities. Cheers!