I'm with you. I've just recently upgraded to a Nokia 6230i from a Sony 700i.
Although the Sony phone played up, it work perfectly with iSync. I thought that I would go for the reliability of the Nokia, but what a mistake on my part.
Now I am stuck with the Nokia for at least 12 months. It will probably go in a cupboard and I will continue to struggle with the Sony.
Apple is missing the boat with the Nokia 6230/6230i. If they want more people to crossover from the PC platform they are going to have to a **** of a lot more work. I have used Macs for nigh on 20 years, and little things like the issue of iSync totally infuriate me.
Come on Mr Jobs and your team, buck up your ideas.
Why don't you fill this form out, don't know if it will do any good, but I've done it.
http://www.apple.com/feedback/isync.html