It's described in the User's Guide (http://manuals.info.apple.com/en/iphoneuserguide.pdf) on page 39. From the favorites list, tap Edit. Tap the red circle for the contact you want to remove from the list, then tap remove. Tap Done. The contact will remain in the contacts list.
I tried that and all it does is take off the user name when I delete the phone number. then only the favorites phone number comes up with out the name. how can I delete the whole contact from favorites only and not main contacts list
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Favorites - Can't delete without losing the contact
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