Why won’t my Samsung download iTunes. It’s a blinking computer for flip sake 😡

Is this an Android device? - there is no iTunes for Android. It's apparently possible to transfer the contents of your itunes Library to a Samsung device:

https://m.androidcentral.com/samsung-brings-itunes-and-ios-data-galaxy-devices-easy-phone-sync

Of course that wouldn't include anything which was DRM protected such as movies or older purchases. However an Apple Music app is available in the Play Store:

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.apple.android.music

Impossible to say why as you haven't given any information. What happens when you try to download it ? It's running windows ? What have you tried to see if you can download it ? Have you tried asking in the iTunes For Windows forum on here (assuming that it's running windows) ?