new IOS 13 completely screwed up my iphone 7.

Hey there RonronS,

Thanks for reaching out to Apple Support Communities. I understand your iPhone 7 is not starting up as expected, and you’re having issues restoring it. It's hard to determine why the update occurred without someone approving it but I’ll be happy to help you with getting it up and running.

You have a couple of options in order to continue with restoring your iPhone. One is to go to the iCloud website, and remove your device from Find my iPhone there. Take a look at this article for info on how you can do this:

iCloud: Remove your device from Find My iPhone

The other option is to place your iPhone in recovery mode. You can read more about how to do this using the steps from this link:

If you can't update or restore your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch

If your iPhone will still not start up after restoring, it may need service. You also mentioned an issue with the battery life on it. All rechargeable batteries are consumable components that become less effective as they chemically age. If it does start up, go and check the Maximum Capacity in Settings > Battery > Battery Health. If it’s at 79% or lower, it may be time to replace your battery. In either of these cases, you can use the following link to reach out to Apple Support to look into your service options with you:

Contact Apple Support 

If it’s at 80% or higher, follow the tips in this link to maximize the amount of time your device runs before it needs to be recharged:

Batteries - Maximizing Performance

Best wishes.

Apple has totally ruined find my iPhone. I can see wife’s but she can not see mine. Plus stupid app keeps sending messages. Can not delete this useless piece of crap.