My iPhone 7 says its disabled and connect to iTunes

Click on this link please. It contains the instructions you need to reset the device in this situation.If you see the Restore screen on your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch - https://support.apple.com/HT203122

You will have to erase the device and set it up again. You can restore from a backup on a computer or iCloud.

Restore your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch from a backup - https://support.apple.com/HT204184

Yes, if that is the message that you see on the device. If you don’t have a computer running iTunes, you can make an appointment at an Apple Store and ask for their help or use a friend or family member’s computer that is running the latest version of iTunes.

There is no itunes anymore and nothing comes up when I plug it into my mac - I don't want to erase my phone. I just want it to unlock

Yes, there is no iTunes and the article still tells you what to do if you don't have iTunes. Did you actually read the instructions in the link?