how to get to control center without swipe up?

You could try to use AssistiveTouch to access Control Centre. Ask Siri to turn it on for you.

If device is frozen, here are instructions what you can try to do: https://support.apple.com/en-ie/HT201412.

You swipe down for the top right of the XR screen to get to the control center not swipe up.

Try a forced restart of your phone.

1. Press and quickly release the volume up button.
2. Press and quickly release the volume down button.
3. Press and hold the side button.
4. When the Apple logo appears, release the button.

You must swipe up to open Control Center.