my iPhone doesn't show up on iTunes
my iPhone doesn't shoe on iTunes
iPhone XS
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Is your phone currently working? If it is it should show up in iTunes, unless you have a Mac with Catalina or Big Sur; then it should show up in Finder.
If your phone is disabled it will not show up in iTunes unless you follow the procedure below:
See this Apple support link ➡️ If you forgot the passcode on your iPhone, or your iPhone is disabled - Apple Support
Or watch this companion video ⬇️