Why does my phone show all the calls made on my wife’s phone. Hers doesn’t show my calls

Stop sharing an Apple ID with your wife. Apple IDs are personal; they shouldn’t be shared any more than you would share a toothbrush. If you share an Apple ID with someone else many bad things will happen. Each user should have their own Apple ID, then you can create Family Sharing→What is Family Sharing? - Apple Support. That way you can share what you want to share and not share what you don’t want to share.

It is OK to share an Apple ID among devices used by one person, such as an iPhone, an iPad and a Mac; in fact, it is a very useful thing to do. But not between devices used by different people.

Here is Apple’s FAQ: https://appleid.apple.com/faq/#!&page=faq. See the 4th bullet item.

Stop sharing an Apple ID. Apple IDs are individual, and devices signed into the same Apple ID will be assumed to belong to the same person, and sync many things including calls.