Screen Time
I am able to control my daughter’s screen time on her phone from mine but on her phone it doesn’t say send a request it just wants you to put the passcode in.
iPhone 12
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If you miss an Ask to Buy notification, you can find the request in Notification Center on your iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, or Mac. If you still don't see your Ask to Buy requests, check which Apple ID you're signed in with, check your Family Sharing settings, and make sure that you're on a supported device.