Is applec.om legitimate?

When I move my computer mouse over a link it displays the actual URL to which the link leads. Just because a link name says it goes to Apple.com (which is Apple's domain) does not mean the URL takes you there. That's a popular scammer trick.

Another way to approach this is to see which service is being requested and then find a way to do it independently of the link. So, for example, if a link tell you to click on it to update your payment method, instead see how Apple tells you to do this: Change, add, or remove Apple ID payment methods - Apple Support

Follow the known and approved set of directions.

Scam artist are getting very clever so I pretty much automatically no not believe anything I receive which involves security and instead verify it using my own methods.

FWIW, here's what Apple says:

Identifying legitimate emails from the iTunes Store - http://support.apple.com/HT201679

Recognize and avoid phishing messages, phony support calls, and other scams - https://support.apple.com/HT204759

Apple will never ask for a SSN. There's only one time and then it isn't Apple asking:

Identity verification for Apple Pay Cash - Apple Support - https://support.apple.com/HT207887 - SSN is a requirement by the bank