I’m trying to pair my watch with my phone but it tells me there is software update it can’t load…I’ve been working in this for 5 days and have reset my watch , etc…still stuck on the pairing screen, but won’t pair

Hey there ShelCul,

We'd like to help get you back to enjoying your watch paired with your iPhone without any issues, so let's start ruling out some basics:

1. As you mentioned it prompts you to update, what exactly is it asking you to update?
2. If you have a compatible iPhone model, the latest version is iOS 15.1. You can verify this within Settings > General > About. Here's a link that'll show how to first back up, then Update your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch.
3. Are you able to still access the Settings app in your watch? If yes, and you have a compatible model, the latest version is watchOS 8.1. You can verify this within Settings > General > About. Here's a link that'll show how to Update your Apple Watch.
4. Have you already tried all of the steps above your post? Here it is again just in case: If you can't pair an Apple Watch with your iPhone

Take care!

See fireyjack's reply to:

Apple Watch series 3 updates.. - Apple Community