Please believe me when I say that I really do not wish to sound snorty but there really is only one solution for you.
Buy a new car…
Here is why. For years Apple touted the MFI program sending 3rd party manufacturers through endless hoops to ensure comparability with iPods, iPads and iPhones. All good yes? Well, it was until Apple screwed everybody by wrecking things on their end. The “iPod interface” has been buggy for years and now it seems Apple finally gave up on it.
My 2010 Volvo has never received any software updates since it left the factory. It is “iPod compatible”, has been so for years but no longer is. As you probably realise, I cannot blame Volvo.