Ringer volume not changing when using headphones/airpods

Hello, I'm wondering if there's any way to stop having the iPhone ring as loud as it possibly can right in my ear while I have headphones in.

I realize that I can change the volume of the ringer, however when I'm not using headphones I need the ringer to be maximum volume, and I simply can not accept lowering the ringer volume every time I put an airpod in. Please tell me that this basic feature is hidden somewhere in the IOS setting. There must be some way for the iPhone to remember the volume the ringer was at last time you were using headphones. Please, I can't take this anymore.