Apple ID i created years ago is no longer a apple ID for me

1.

If you have deleted it, it is no longer valid, it simply no longer exists and it no longer works.

To understand about a deleted Apple ID, see the Apple articles below:

How to delete your Apple ID account

How to delete your Apple ID account – Apple Support (UK)

Understand and control the personal information that you store with Apple

Understand and control the personal information that you store with Apple - Apple Support

2.

May be you stil have that Apple ID, check your Apple ID via your email box, see this Apple article: If you forgot your Apple ID

If you forgot your Apple ID email address or phone number - Apple Support                  

OR see -> Having trouble signing in?

https://iforgot.apple.com/password/verify/appleid

See -> If you can't connect or sign in to iCloud

If you can't connect or sign in to iCloud - Apple Support

3.

See this Apple article: If your Apple ID is locked or disabled

If your Apple ID is locked or disabled - Apple Support (CA)

-> Get a verification code and sign in with two-factor authentication

Get a verification code and sign in with two-factor authentication - Apple Support

4.

Contact Apple for help with Apple ID account security

Contact Apple for help with Apple ID account security - Apple Support