phone
my iPhone 12 is disabled and says connect to iTunes but it doesn't pop up on my laptop, what do i do ?
iPhone 12
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There is a special process.
You can sometimes remedy this without a computer if on iOS 15.2 or later by tapping on "erase iPhone" , but you will still need the Apple ID password. It will WIPE the phone, no choice!
How to remove your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch passcode without a computer - Apple Support
video
ios 15.1 and earlier:
If you've forgotten your iPhone passcode – Apple Support (UK)
If you think this was accidentally done then turn off Raise to Wake in Settings, Display & Brightness and turn off Tap to Wake in Settings, Accessibility, Touch to prevent it opening in your pocket or purse.
The usual cause is the kids or friends putting in the wrong code too many times.