can not update the software on my ipad

The tags appended to your post suggest that you have an iPad Air with iOS12.x installed. The first generation iPad Air, iPad mini2 and mini3 can only be updated to iOS 12.5.6.

Apple ended major update support for these models of iPad in September 2019 - although they continue to receive occasional “point” security updates, the most recent being released August 2022. These devices cannot be updated to iPadOS 13 (or any later major versions of iPadOS) as the internal hardware does not meet the minimum technical requirements (CPU capabilities and available RAM) for newer versions of iOS/iPadOS.

Some App developers have dropped support for iOS versions preceding iOS 13.x for technical reasons (often because APIs or software libraries upon which they rely have been updated in the new version of iPadOS, making their App incompatible with earlier versions). 

Whilst many App titles remain compatible with your iPad, if you want or need to access to Apps requiring the most recent versions of iOS, you’ll need to consider replacement of your iPad with a newer or current model that supports iPadOS15.

Whether or not you are able to update any iPad to a newer version of iOS/iPadOS will be dictated by the iPad model - and the currently installed version of iOS. You can find this information here:

Settings > General > About

Not sure which iPad you have? Identify your iPad model.

Here is a list of the highest version of iOS supported by the older models of iPad (for simplicity - “generations” are shortened to a number) that are restricted in their ability to be updated:

iPad1 - iOS 5.1.1

iPad2, iPad3 and iPad mini1 - iOS 9.3.5 (WiFi Only models), iOS 9.3.6 (WiFi & Cellular)

iPad4 - iOS 10.3.3 (WiFi Only), iOS 10.3.4 (WiFi & Cellular)

iPad Air1, iPad mini2 and iPad mini3 - iOS 12.5.6

Newer models, not appearing in this list, are all able to be updated to the current version, iPadOS 15.7

If your iPad is capable of being updated to a more recent version of iOS/iPadOS than is currently installed, these support pages outline both the available methods by which the update can be performed - and troubleshooting should you experience difficulties:

Update your iPhone, iPad or iPod touch – Apple Support

If you can't update or restore your iPhone, iPad or iPod touch – Apple Support

If your iPhone, iPad or iPod touch won’t update - Apple Support

iOS update and restore errors – Apple Support

Be aware that while an iPad may be capable of update, it may be too far behind the current version to be updated directly from iPad settings. In such circumstances you will likely need to use a computer to perform the update. You will need access to either a PC (with iTunes installed) or a Mac (with iTunes or Finder - as appropriate for the installed version of MacOS). Ensure that your installed version of iTunes has been updated to the most recent version; the essential device drivers are included.

Download and use iTunes for Windows – Apple Support

Update to the latest version of iTunes – Apple Support

Update software on iPhone, iPad or iPod touch in iTunes on PC - Apple Support

If you have a beta profile installed, ensure this has been removed from your iPad - as, otherwise, installation of production software updates may be inhibited. This support page provides the necessary information to remove the beta from your iPad:

How to uninstall iOS beta software - Apple Support

You should note that for your iPad to install an available update, its battery must be charged to at least 50% capacity - and/or be connected to its Power Adapter. Similarly, the iPad can only be updated over a standard WiFi connection - or be updated by a PC or Mac using iTunes or Finder - over a USB connection.

It is highly possible that your iPad year and model will not ever be able to upgrade/update beyond any version of iOS 12, which is, currently, at iOS 12.5.6.

The 2013 iPad Air 1 ( “A” model number A1474/1475/1476 ), iPad Mini 2 ( “ A” model number A1489/1490/1491 ) and the 2014 iPad Mini 3 ( “A” model number A1599/1600/1601 ) cannot upgrade beyond any version of iOS 12.

Sorry.

These iPad models have overall internal hardware that is too old, too underpowered and incapable of running all of the new, advanced and internal hardware resource intensive features of the newest iPadOS versions.

These iPad models are 8 and 9-years old, now, in 2022.

Sorry.

Third party app support, typically, continues for 2-3 years AFTER Apple ends full support of a subset of their devices.

The last major update to iOS 12 was in 2019, with iOS 12.3.

Apple has stopped issuing any major iOS 12 updates for these very old iPad models and have been ONLY issuing security, “point” updates for the past few years.

So, year three is coming to an end and third party app support has been on a steady, downward/decline trend for all iOS 12 supported devices.

Look for many more third party apps dropping support for all iOS 12 supported devices as the 2022 year progresses to its end and into the beginning of 2023.

The immediately above statement is what you really need to worry about.

In addition, the internal, rechargeable batteries in these old iPads are, also, running on borrowed time.

Not worth the costs to replace these old internal, rechargeable batteries in these old iPads, any longer, either.

Also, these very old iPad models have NO real trade-in nor any resale value, either.

Sorry.

It is the Fall of 2022, now.

iPadOS 16 will be released, sometime, soon, this October 2022.

These 8 to 9-year old, iOS 12 iPad models are coming to their end of life.

You really need to seriously consider a purchase of a new iPad model OR a much, MUCH “newer” and less expensive, refurbished or used iPad models, from better known, trusted sources, like other Apple product/device retailers/resellers, some locally or from online, on the Web/Internet, capable of running the latest iPadOS versions.

There are PLENTY of newer, older iPad models that can run the latest, current versions of iPadOS.

If you need OR ONLY able to afford to purchase older, less expensive iPad models, look at older IPads from 2015 and later.

All of these older model iPads below CAN, currently, run the latest releases of iPadOS 15 and the up and coming iPadOS 16, releasing sometime in the Fall of 2022.

2015-2017, 12.9 inch screen iPad Pro models. ( 1st gen Pencil support )

2017, 10.5 inch screen iPad Pro models ( 1st gen Pencil support )

2017, 9.7 inch screen iPad 5th gen models ( NO Pencil support )

2018, 9.7 inch screen iPad 6th gen models ( 1st gen Pencil support )

2019, 10.2 inch screen iPad 7th gen models ( 1st gen Pencil support )

2020, 10.2 inch screen iPad 8th gen models. ( 1st gen Pencil support )

2018, 11 inch or 12.9 inch screen iPad Pro models ( 2nd gen Pencil support )

2019, 10.5 inch screen iPad Air 3rd gen models ( 1st gen Pencil support )

2019, 7.9 inch screen iPad Mini 5th gen models ( 1st gen Pencil support )

Get the largest internal data storage model you can afford as NO Apple iOS device has ANY expandable storage.

I am sorry that you had to learn all of this, but this does not change any of the facts regarding these older iOS devices.

Please recycle all electronics devices properly and responsibly.

Sorry & Best of Luck to You!

If you decide to go down the path of purchasing used, secondhand Apple devices, from individual Apple device sellers, here is how to avoid purchasing an Apple iOS/iPadOS device with user activation lock, in the future.

If you purchase any iPad, or any Apple iOS device, for that matter, used/second hand, online, or even in-person, make sure this iPad does NOT have user activation lock and has been properly reset for sale.

A properly reset for sale iPad should initially power up to an animated, multi-language “Welcome” screen.

DO NOT take the iPad seller's word that this iPad is user activation lock free!

We have seen plenty of used iOS device purchasers get scammed.

User Activation Lock can never be bypasss, circumvented or worked around IF there is no correct previous/original user information to be able to do so.

Apple doesn't get involved with ANY user activation locked, used/second-hand sold devices, either.

So, buyer beware!

If purchasing a used device in-person, power the iPad ON

If the iPad DOES NOT display the initial animated, multi-language “Welcome” screen, then pass on purchasing this iPad.

If the iPad powers up to any other screen, then forget purchasing this iPad.

You cannot trust that the seller actually has the correct needed info to properly reset the iPad back to factory settings right then and there before the actual purchase and exchange of money for the iPad, in question.

Pass on the device!

If you are purchasing this used iPad online ask the seller to provide multiple images, either online or be sent to you via email, showing this animated, multi-language “Welcome” screen of the interested in purchasing iPad model.

Even better, ask for a short video be sent to you showing this animated, multi-language “Welcome” screen, in action and in its entirety, posted to the online ad or emailed to you.

If the online iPad seller refuses any of these requests, pass on the iPad. DO NOT buy!

Good Luck to You!