I need tio remove my wife from my AppleID so she has her own identity and requirements but I can't seem to do it as everything ties back to my Apple ID

Hello CardiffCity1927,

Which particular info/data are you experiencing issues with removing from the Apple ID?

If you're looking to remove their device(s) from the Apple ID then this may be done via Settings > [your name] > Tap the device in the list > Remove from Account.

Managing most aspects of the Apple ID may be done from within the Apple ID site here as well after signing in: Manage your Apple ID

With regards to purchased content (music, movies, etc.) then you may explore using Family Sharing which can help with sharing various bits of purchased content: Family Sharing - Apple

Cheers.