i forgot my mac password and tried restraining it but the reset with apple id doesn't show me

First, you will need to start up from macOS recovery. The procedure Will vary, Wether you have an Apple silicon mac or an Intel one

• Apple silicon: Turn on your Mac and continue to press and hold the power button until you see the startup options window. Select the gear icon labeled Options, then click Continue.
• Intel processor: Turn on your Mac and immediately press and hold Command (⌘)-R until you see an Apple logo or other image.

You can now try and Reset your password via the terminal, Using the instructions Below

1. From the Utilities menu in the menu bar, choose Terminal.
2. In the Terminal window, type resetpassword, then press Return to open the Reset Password assistant.
3. If you're asked to select an admin user you know the password for, click “Forgot all passwords?”.
4. At the Reset Password window, click Deactivate Mac, then click Deactivate to confirm.
5. If you see an Activation Lock window, enter your Apple ID email and password, then click Next.
6. At the Reset Password window, enter your new password information, then click Next.
7. If this window shows multiple user accounts, click the Set Password button next to each account name, then enter the new password information for each account.
8. When the password reset is completed, click Exit.
9. Choose Apple menu  > Restart, then log in with your new password.

If you cannot Reset your password this way, you Will need to Erase your mac (you will lose all of your data that you’ve not backed up) while following these instructions

1. Shut down your Mac, then start up from macOS recovery as described previously.
2. When you're asked to select an admin user you know the password for, choose Erase Mac from the Recovery Assistant menu in the menu bar.
3. From the Erase Mac window, click Erase Mac, then click Erase Mac to confirm. 
4. If your Mac restarts to a flashing question mark, press and hold the power button for a few seconds until your Mac turns off.
5. Start up from macOS Recovery again, then reinstall macOS. For details, see How to reinstall macOS. 

Hope this helps you! See this article for further reference https://support.apple.com/en-us/HT212190