My iPhone is disabled by iTunes and Apple how do I fix it

It is not "disabled by iTunes".

It is disabled because the passcode was entered incorrectly too many times.

You need to connect it to your computer and restore iOS.

If you forgot your iPhone passcode or your iPhone is disabled - Apple Support

The iPhone is telling you to use iTunes – on a Mac or PC – to reset it.

iTunes was the original management software for iPods and iPhones, and even though the management functions are now in the Mac Finder (or in the Apple Devices application for Windows 10 and 11), iPods and iPhones are still programmed to display a message referring to the older Mac and PC software.