Starting with a used machine is tricky. I think the best way to do that is to totally re-install OS X and start over as if it's brand new machine. You will need the original Install Discs that came with the machine or a Snow Leopard upgrade disc. If you don't have either you were ripped off, you need to get one or the other.
1. How I de-authorise ir and register it as mine, ie, wih my Mac ID and login. It's supposedly had a clean install of the OS; does that mean it's already de-authorised?
The best way to do this is by doing a clean install. You need the original Install discs or the Snow Leopard upgrade disk to do this safely. There are many articles on this, here is a Youtube video I located that shows how to do it using the SL upgrade disc.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z0K-mD8rAyA&feature=related
2. How do I move my Photos and iTunes music library into iLife? Is it complicated by the fact it's the newer version of iLife?
Impossible to say without knowing where they are now. If you have an old Mac the best way to do this is using Startup Assistant which will work when you do a clean install of OS X. Again refer to the video.
3. How do I make it my chosen machine for syncing with my iPhone? Will I lose anything in migrating the iPhone to a different machine?
Assuming you do a clean install and migrate from your old Mac this will not be an issue, using Startup Assistant it will move all your data, libraries, applications etc over to the new machine.
4. How do I migrate my iWeb pages, so that the new machine uploads to my website?
Same answer as #3.
5. How do I get to keep all my Firefox bookmarks and Address Book contacts?
Same answer as #3.
6. What settings do I need to copy from Mail to get my email started?
Same answer as #3.
Roger