me and my wife have an iphone each but they are both linked to the same library but we want different apps and music on the phones. So how do i unlink them so we have 1 library each?
You can sync as many devices as you want to the same iTunes library, there is no limit. You can have the same content on each device or different content, the choice is yours. iTunes will keep everything straight, by device, upon subsequent syncs. All you have to do is select what content you want/don't want on each phone under the various tabs in iTunes & then hit the sync button. If you want completely separate libraries, that would require separate iTunes accounts and would best work with separate computer logins. However, if all you want is different content on each phone, that's not necessary.
why wouldn't you just do as suggested by wjosten above and keep syncing to the same itunes? we have 2 iphone 4's and 1 ipod touch 4g in our house and we sync them to the same itunes account. why? because we can put whatever we want on each device. if my 12 year old daughter buys an app i like, i can use it on my iphone 4 without purchasing it a second time, if i don't like it i just uncheck it before i sync my iphone 4. for us it works, we can put different stuff on our device, or some of the same stuff.