I never find much satisfaction in solving a problem when you don't really know what solved it. I came full circle- ended up where I started and now it seems to have worked. I say "seems" because I won't know til I view the final bluray disc to be sure. The Quicktime movie is playing perfectly now.
In comparison the projects at work, I did recall one difference- that was that my work projects were actually filmed with XDCAM HD 25mb/s not 35. FCP actually interprets the 25mb/s codec has HDV. Weird, I know, so I changed my sequence settings to HDV, and rendered and exported. The resulting Quicktime file's audio was finally in sync, only the picture looked horrible. The digital blocking was so bad, it looked like I put a mosaic filter on it or something. So, in desperation, I reverted back to my original XDCAM 35mb/s codec settings. I did use Render manager this time to trash all my render files (maybe that was some secret fix?) and then I just exported a Quicktime file without pre-rendering the timeline. And this morning, the resulting Quicktime movie looks great and the audio is in sync. go figure.
I wish I could say I know what fixed it, but I have no idea.