bad memory crashing afp - Parallels VM on Snow Leopard server 10.6.5

Hello, just asking for any thoughts on this. I have a dual quad core 2.93 xserve running parallels. On it, I have a 10.6.5 server running as a vm. In just the last week it started crashing AFP at random times but usually when it has around 80 - 100 connections going. Stopping afp with server admin and restarting it, didnt seem to do the trick. I had to reboot the VM then it would work for another 8 or 9 hours before going thru the same thing again. What I noticed that was weird was whenever I rebooted it, it would come up with the "your memory is in the correct configuration" or something like that just after login. Normally that only shows after a memory change. On here it was every reboot. I shut down that VM and changed the order that I started the 5 VM's. By firing up that particular server before the others, I no longer get that notice. Is it possible that there is a bit of bad memory and by playing with the order of the VM's starting I may have used a different area of memory that didnt have the problem? Is this a problem others have seen with Parallels? Ive got 36gb and I have 25 or so assigned to VM's.

Just looking for confirmation or not that others may have come across this headache.

Could someone suggest a good quality mem tester that gets in their deep?

Thanks.