Wow, lots of tangents in this thread. Apologies in advance if I am over-simple.
• Aperture is a single-user application. In the interest of simplicity I suggest focusing first on setting up your new MBP, because that is the lead Aperture operation. Aperture is in its third pro version and absolutely can be done well on 2011 MBP hardware for single user. Only after the single-user setup is clear and fully functional should you worry about how a second user will view images.
• Step one is your workflow should separately back up original images before they are touched by Aperture or any other images management app. This is critical to avoid the "Aperture ate my images" type comments we see here all the time, and lots of otherwise-competent manuals and individuals do show workflows importing directly into Aperture, which is horrible images management workflow.
• A 2.2 GHz 2011 MBP (I own one) with SSD and 8 GB RAM will rock Aperture.
Specs:
15" or 17" 2.2 GHz. $250 additional for 2.3 GHz is cost-ineffective.
6750M graphics a must (comes with 2.2 GHz models).
SSD a must. 256 GB recommended; even 128 GB will handle a 30k ref-images Library fine.
Order with stock 4 GB RAM.
The 2011 MBPs will take 16 GB RAM but for now 8 GB is cost-effective. As previously noted buy RAM from third parties. I have used OWC for more than a decade:
http://eshop.macsales.com/shop/memory/Apple_MacBook_MacBook_Pro/Upgrade/DDR3_133 3MHz_SDRAM
OWC will buy back the original two 2-GB DIMMs from Apple.
Choice of display size and type is personal. When I finally moved to the 17" size I was amazed at how much better everything works on the 75% more pixels and hella more screen real estate of the 17" size. And I use it in my lap a lot.
OTOH some folks connect to external displays most of the time, in which case the value of the 17" size diminishes. And the high resolution displays do have a downside of smaller fonts that some folks (me) do not like. Personally I tolerate the small fonts because images are much better viewed on high-resolution.
Many image pros prefer matte displays and I am one of them. The glare displays absolutely gag me, but it is each individual's choice. Check them all out at an Apple Store, and experience the various different lighting angles that are forced on us when we use a mobile display.
• Only the 17" size has an Express Card 34mm slot ("EC/34"). EC/34 rocks for input when paired with fast UDMA camera cards. My recent coarse tests of the 2011 17" MBP's EC/34 slot:
SanDisk Extreme Pro Express Card Adapter for CF cards from Amazon, $40.
Approximate real-world test results in the 2011 17" MBP:
-Sandisk Extreme III CF Card, SanDisk EC/34 Adapter = ~10 MB/sec
-Sandisk Extreme IV CF Card, SanDisk EC/34 Adapter = ~37 MB/sec
-Sandisk Extreme IV CF Card, SanDisk EC/34 Adapter = ~36 MB/sec
-Sandisk Extreme Pro CF (UDMA6), SanDisk EC/34 Adapter = ~80 MB/sec
With fast CF cards upload speeds via the EC/34 slot are sweet; fast enough to literally change workflows. For comparison, a Sony USB card reader's fastest upload was ~12 MB/sec. My emphasis has been on images uploading to date, but cheap prices of slower CF cards are making me look at using the EC/34 slot for backup in the field as well.
EC/34 SD adapters also available, and presumably Thunderbolt adapters will become available that allow the same fast i/o for all 2011 Macs, but it has not happened yet.
• The optical drive slot in your new MBP can easily and inexpensively be retrofitted with a 750 GB hard drive or a second SSD from OWC when your boot SSD starts to fill up. That is what I will do when my 128 GB SSD fills.
• I strongly recommend keeping the Aperture Library on your new MBP's SSD. Initially also put the (referenced) Masters on the SSD while you are working on them. That is what I do, and the Aperture performance is spectacular.
Then experiment with how you offload (i.e., move the referenced-Masters on the SSD to another drive) images after you are done editing them. Your NAS may or may not work just fine as a repository for referenced Masters. If it does not, hard drives are cheap.
• How your wife views the images is IMO a fully separate consideration with lots of alternatives. Personally I would be looking to cloud solutions (e.g. publish each project to the Cloud as you complete the edits) but it really depends on what you and your wife personally want to achieve.
HTH
-Allen Wicks