Hey, sorry. I'm not trying to mislead anyone - so no reason for the tone.
The OP was asking specifically about email with Outlook 2011. The discussion was originally about failure to get the iCloud email settings to work with Outlook 2011 as a Mac client.
I was answering only about that.
It's possible to use iCal and the Mac OS X address book for your calendars and contacts, and then to use Outlook 2011 for your mail client. This is a viable solution for people "with a life," as you put it, that also incoprorates Outlook 2011 as an IMAP client with iCloud mail.
So if the question is about getting icloud mail to work with outlook (and this was the question): it can be done.
As to the separate question -- not posed by the OP -- of whether Outlook 2011's address book and calendars will work with iCloud: I haven't even looked into this, but if you say it doesn't work I have no reason to doubt it.