set up iphone 4s loop

Well so far the switch from an iphone 3gs to a 4s has been complete ****. I updated my itunes, updated my 3gs, then synced them. Then I followed the step by step instructions on my new 4s and all the **** phone does in itunes is loop in the initial set up mode where i'm trying to restore my phoen from back up. I choose my phone (we have two on my itunes - my wife and me) and it restes it but then comes right back to the choose which restore to use and again and again and again, etc. I'm ****** off beyond belief. *** apple!!!! Oh and I also had the old can't access apple store problem from previously and had to do the whole reset winsock thing again in windows. Has apple even tested this crap before releasing it to the public. i'm on hour #5 just tyring to get this **** thing to work. There is no excuse for this. I've had 3 iphones prior to this and all the transitions went smooth as silk. Why is this one so **** hard. Also, on my wife's 4s, it won't accept our apple id and says it's already in use after asking me to input my email. This makes no sense. I can log into itunes using my id on my computer, so why can't it work on this new 4s. Is this something with icloud? I never had a mobile me. It keeps telling me to reset my password if I forgot it which I haven't. If Jobs wasn't dead at this point I think I'd kill him myself.