The iTunes WiFi sync only works when you have wifi enabled and you run iTunes on your computer and they are both in the same wifi network and you have enabled WiFi sync in iTunes (while the phone is connected by cable, in the Summary page).
Syncing iPhone when connected via USB to the computer is not WiFi sync. Besides, while connected to USB the phone is actually charging, filling the battery, not emptying it.
Apple says it will sync when connected to the WiFi network and charging. I see it connects to iTunes whenever iTunes is running. You can then sync manually. Or, charge it and it will sync automatically.
I believe there is no way WiFi sync can work, when you have WiFi disabled (thus, no way to consume battery power). But it seems, that the messages are somewhat misleading. Perhaps when WiFi is disabled, it should display on the iTunes WiFi sync page something like "WiFi is disabled"...
Various omments and advice from Apple suggests, that you may expect dinificant battery drain during WiFi sync if: you are not charging (obviously, if you are charging during the sync, that does not drain the battery, but the charger), you have large number of unsynched songs etc. They sometimes talk about 'incomplete transferes' that you need to fix or it will presumably continue trying to sync those. But in any case, as long as the sync is only initiated when you are chargng, it should not depete your battery.
Having said all this, I have WiFi sync enabled, WiFi enabled at all time and I don't find these consume noticeably more battery.