Thanks very much for your help, Chris.
You make some points, but it micromanages my reason that no one would be interested in, really.
Hitting just a few high points: If I write a novel here & over-explain, it does not appreciably change the bottom line.
Suffice it to say, if a device is used primarily by one member of the household, the account is held by said person. That seems logical vs designating a "head of household" account. Though the efficiency of one family account is reasonable as well.
iPads are easy to steal. And awkward to master password very well.
I don't like one-stop shopping for identity theft. (Yes, there are password managers, but they all have the same ease-of-use on the iPad keyboard).
You have keychains for a reason: so you don't trot around with all your passwords. I have many.
Apple store employees want to guarantee a good experience out of the box, & thus push hard to have a working device for the 'feel good.' Makes good sense. The end result was to set up a new account for the primary user, which I would have foregone if I were the primary user. You don't "gift" a device, but then brand it with your name, as I already said in another post. It is not MY primary device, though I do use it occasionally.
I have to disagree about one thing:
There IS in fact a difference between the iPad & the iTunes versions of software available & its price.
(Yes, I understand the difference between the iOS & MacOS)
In several cases an iPad iOS version of an app which started on the MacOS, is listed on the pad at a price not viewable on the desktop iTunes version: I cannot get to the lower price iPad version to gift it from the desktop computer.
Trusting that I can forge ahead & easily sort it out later, is what left me with the multiple account mess. I still think its the way to go, so long as I can gift to other accounts.
Again, store commonality is not true for all applications. There is one elegant productivity app that I have had for a very long time on the desktop, but is pricey & I've let lapse a few years ago. It is available on the Mac for $40, more still for the "Pro" version. The iPad version is $20 - but does NOT appear on my desktop to gift in an iPad configuration. It would be quite useful on the iPad.