Frustrated by Photo Stream

I love the idea of Photo Stream, but I'm continually frustrated by it. The biggest issue is that I never know when the photos are going to show up. Yes, I know my iOS devices have to be on Wi-Fi. I'll even confirm that and go to Safari and load a web page. I've also tried leaving the Photo app open on the iPhone.

The ads show someone snapping a photo on an iPhone and the pics instantly showing up on the other devices.

When will they come? !!

When I did large batch of selling on eBay a few months back I thought Photo Stream would be great. But, again, no telling when the photos would show up. Ended up going to my regular digital camera and popping the SD card in to my Mac. It was much more effecient.

Also, why does iPhoto continually ask me to enable Photo Stream. Not all the time, but ever so often if I click on the Photo Stream it asks me to turn it on like I've never used it!

So, I guess my question is: Is there a way to force a refresh? Is there any way to know when photos will show up?