After a week of testing it seems that the problem is still there.
Here is what I have done:
1) reset nvram settings
2) # sudo nvram boot-args="iog=0x0"
Here is what the situation is:
If i press reset button and close the lid before the system is up, I'll get my external monitor on and everything will be fine (meaning, resolution on the external monitor is high) as long as the lid is closed. If I open the lid display will go on and the resolution on the external monitor goes down (which is my main issue). This would be OK or at least something that I can accept BUT, when I disconnect my external monitor and use lap top (so I have opened the lid and woke up the system) once I plug in the external monitor again, I have to restart the system in order to get external monitor on while the lid is closed.
Why this is an issue to me:
I have kind of old MBP (early 2008) and even my external monitor is of relatively low resolution graphic card can not provide high resolution on display and external monitor at same time (the highest I get is 1280x1024 having upper and portion of the screen black after reducing resolution on the display to the minimum one).
Now, why would I like to keep plugging and unplugging the external monitor all the time. Well, first this is something that I would like to be able to do, no matter why, and then the real reason is that I have only this one computer and I use it at the office as a desktop with external monitor and then I take it with me home where I use it as a laptop.
Basically as long as I'm not able to turn off the display and have external monitor on I have a problem. The minor issue is that I'd like to have the lid open while display off, but that is less important at this point.
I'm disappointed that Apple can't fix this for more than a month and a half already. Or at least I haven't found the solution on the web.