and have an IPhone 5 until yesterday, I could delete on my Iphone and it wouldn;t delete on my desktop, but now it deletes everywhere. Is there a way to set it up so it only deletes on the IPhone
That's the way it's supposed to work. Active Sync provides full synchronization between the server and the clients.
Don't know why it wasn't working correctly before. You would have to ask your IT department.
My wife has the same phone and we configured them at the same time, and hers is not deleting so there must be a setting somewhere. Will keep digging
Not if you're using Exchange Active sync.
There may be a setting in Outlook depending on how you have the mail account configured.
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