Quality - iPhone, iTunes, IOS 6.1.2

What is happening to Apple's quality control and commitment to seamless work? iPhone 5 64gb, IOS 6.1.2, iTunes 11.0.1.12, Windows 8 - quality of the whole system appalling. The iPhone won't back up to the computer; installing 6.1.2 crashed the phone - rebuild. My custom tones - working all right before - won't appear on the phone. (I read the work arounds on the web - and it should just not be possible that so much can be wrong. Why should we have to delete ring tones, reload them, only sync selected music and videos and then maybe the ringtones will sync. Is anyone else as fed up with this nonsense as me? I don't want to dedicate my life to my phone - but the other way round.