Hi LaPastenague,
The problem has really been noticeable in the last few months although it did used to very occasionally happen with my old 1Tb TC, the new one is a 2Tb model.
Except for the slow wake-up I find it's okay for the external iTunes library, I can live with the delays.
Ummm... bridge or router I couldn't be too sure. I'm assuming router as we run the cable modem into it & everything out of it. I set it up but just sort of fumbled my way through.
It's connected by ethernet as are all the remote speakers (AppleTV etc) really only use the wireless for iPad, phones etc.
Your description of the OS forgetting is pretty much how it is. The disc will vanish off the desktop but it will still show in a finder window in the side-bar so it only unmounts from the desktop, not the system.