What if the software update tab does not appear in settings?

She takes it to a computer, including a display model at a retail store.

(83232)

You can use a friend's computer or take it to an Apple store where they will do it for you.

If you have an iPad 1, the max iOS is 5.1.1. For newer iPads, the current iOS is 6.1.3. The Settings>General>Software Update only appears if you have iOS 5.0 or higher currently installed.

iOS 5: Updating your device to iOS 5 or Later

http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4972

How to install iOS 6

http://www.macworld.com/article/2010061/hands-on-with-ios-6-installation.html

iOS: How to update your iPhone, iPad, or iPod touch

http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4623

If you are currently running an iOS lower than 5.0, connect the iPad to the computer, open iTunes. Then select the iPad under the Devices heading on the left, click on the Summary tab and then click on Check for Update.

Tip - If connected to your computer, you may need to disable your firewall and anitvirus software temporarily. Then download and install the iOS update. Be sure and backup your iPad before the iOS update. After you update an iPad (except iPad 1) to iOS 6.x, the next update can be installed via wifi (i.e., not connected to your computer).

Tip 2 - If you're updating via wifi, place your iPad close to your router to preclude getting a corrupted download.

 Cheers, Tom 😉

She can use any computer that has itunes installed on it including yours. One caveat though. Do not allow the iPad to Sync with the computer as this will erase all her apps and data. Only use the computer to back up the iPad and perform the update.

There is no Update Tab in iOS 5.1.1, you have the update Tab when iOS 6 is installed.

When it is an iPad 1 there is no further iOS update available, it is max 5.1.1.