It sounds like you purchase all the apps and music for your wife and daughter with one Apple ID, but you want to sync different information to each iPhone. I recommend using method 2 in the article below and just syncing the information you want to each phone using a playlist for the music and selecting only the apps you want on each device:
You may use multiple devices on a computer without the need to create multiple user accounts. To do this, you can set iTunes to update each device with only certain playlists. This method allows you to put all your music on, say, your iPod and keep your iPod shuffle updated with only your workout music. Here's how to do this with iTunes:
I recommend reviewing the full article if you would like to see other options:
You can also download only what you want from the App and iTunes Store to each respective device using the steps in this article:
With either of these methods, you would want to disable automatic downloads on each device so that any new purchases are not automatically downloaded on your wife's phone when your daughter downloads something and vice versa:
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