iPhone 5, Outlook 2013, Windows 7.0 64-bit. Every time I connect my phone to my computer via USB, iTunes opens with the "accept our terms and service" then deselects the boxes checked under the INFO tab to sync my calendars, contacts...help?

I am connecting my iPhone 5 to my Windows computer via USB. This should open iTunes and start the sync process. Instead of iTunes opening, I get the iTunes service agreement to which I must agree. Then iTunes opens and begins to back up my phone. It is syncing my photos and music (although the music thing is another nightmare), but under the "info" tab in iTunes, the boxes of which functions I want to sync are no longer selected. Hence the computer and the phone are not sharing information. When I select the functions I want to sync, I must either replace or merge. If I replace, I lose the information I recently put into my phone. If I choose to merge, then I have duplicates of everything.

How can I resolve this problem? Why is iTunes acting like it doesn't know my phone?

I'm using an iPhone 5 iOS 6.1.4, Windows 7 64-bit, Outlook 13, and the must current version of iTunes (because I've removed and reinstalled it twice already).

Thanks for any help!

Christine