>>Please don't tell me use your ears. (I do use them 200%)<<
Well you're more than halve way there anyway :)!
I too use my ears and for metering tasks I heavily depend on these two apps: AudioLeak http://www.channld.com/audioleak and Insight http://izotope.com/insight/. And as always when performing any sort of metering, it involves little knowledge but an tremendous amount of experience. So I don't think a step by step specific would make you any wiser. But if you do insist to approach it this way, iZotopes insight comes with an excellent thorough tutorial on this matter.
Have a nice day!