Hello Alaa AbdelWareth,
Thank you for the question. It sounds like your iPhone has a connect to iTunes screen, but iTunes does not recognize your iPhone when connected. I recommend the following step:
If you see the Connect to iTunes screen but the device does not appear in iTunes, follow these troubleshooting steps if you're using a Mac, or these steps for Windows computers.
iOS: Unable to update or restore
http://support.apple.com/kb/ht1808
Additionally, I recommend the following article when getting the message "iTunes could not contact the iPhone software update server:"
iTunes for Windows: iTunes can't contact the iPhone, iPad, or iPod software update server
http://support.apple.com/kb/TS1814
Thank you for using Apple Support Communities.
Best,
Sheila M.