Hello five2many,
Thank you for asking your question! It sounds like there are 2 issues going on at the moment. First to address the Passcode Lock issue, you should be able to use this article to reset that:
iOS: Forgotten passcode or device disabled after entering wrong passcode
http://support.apple.com/kb/ht1212
Also, it sounds like the Wi-Fi button is grayed out in your iPhone settings. Try out the troubleshooting steps in this article:
iOS: Wi-Fi settings grayed out or dim
http://support.apple.com/kb/ts1559
Thank you for using Apple Support Communities.
All the very best,
Sterling