Downloaded itunes 11 and iphone now wont connect to itunes

So, I was trying to update my iphone so I did it from my labtop so when i plugged it in and started the update it put my iphone in recovry mode and told me that i needed to also update my itunes before the update for my phone could go through so i did that now my iphone was stuck in recovry mode and wont connect to my labtop so i just tried my family computer and got a back up from 2013 so now that i got that to work i am trying to get my back up from last night and now my iphone wont connect with itunes but comes up on windows and i have tried a list of things on support for this and none of them work pleasse help