As you know, Tesla is using the same cells that are used in notebook-batteries (or am I wrong here?).
Wrong. Lithium yes. Otherwise no.
Tesla states that the ideal range to use is between 20-80% of the capacity of the battery.
Yes, Exactly correct. That however doesnt mean "dont fully charge your battery" (see below)
Now the guy on youtube claims that it is actually very important not to charge your battery to 100% and not immediately use it.
100% nonsense
He says it's extremely harmful to empty a battery and let it sit in that state (that's quite well known),
100% correct
but he says it also harmful to charge it fully and let it sit.
Nonsense. Sitting on charge at 100% not good always/often, charging to 100% and "letting it sit" , no problem
"Apple does not recommend leaving your portable plugged in all the time."
Use the battery all the time, or use AC all the time, and use the batter once a week or once a month, as Apple recommends?
Here:
General consideration of your MacBook battery

Contrary to popular myths about notebook batteries, there is protection circuitry in your Macbook and therefore you cannot ‘overcharge’ your notebook when plugged in and already fully charged.
However if you do not plan on using your notebook for several hours, turn it off (plugged in or otherwise), since you do not want your Macbook ‘both always plugged in and in sleep mode’.
Do not perform “battery calibration” on your current Macbook. There is no calibration of current Apple portable Macbooks with built-in batteries.
A lot of battery experts call the use of Lithium-Ion cells the "80% Rule", meaning use 80% of the full charge or so, then recharge them for longer overall life. The main quantified damage done in the use of Lithium Ion batteries are instances where the internal notebook battery is “often drained very low”, this is bad general use of your notebook battery.
All batteries in any device are a consumable meant to be replaced eventually after much time, even under perfect use conditions.
➕If the massive amount of data that exists on lithium batteries were to be condensed into a simplex, helpful, and memorable bit of information it would be:
1. While realistically a bit impractical during normal everyday use, a lithium battery's longevity and its chemistry's health is most happy swinging back and forth between 20% and 85% charge roughly.
2. Do not purposefully drain your battery very low (10% and less), and do not keep them charged often or always high (100%).
3. Lithium batteries do not like the following:
A: Deep discharges, as meaning roughly 10% or less. Avoid this in all instances if you can. This is hard on your battery.
B: Rapid discharges as referring to energy intensive gaming on battery on a frequent basis (in which case while gaming, if possible, do same on power rather than battery).
C: Constant inflation, as meaning always or most often on charge, and certainly not both in sleep mode and on charge always or often.
From Apple on batteries:
http://www.apple.com/batteries/notebooks.html
http://support.apple.com/kb/HT1446
"Apple does not recommend leaving your portable plugged in all the time."
My question is: If this applies also to my notebook battery, would it be better to NEVER charge my battery fully, thus always using it on battery power (unless when I'm charging it). In my case, I use it at home, so the alternative would be to use it 90% of the time on AC power, but the battery isn't removable, so it would be fully charged all the time. So what is better? Use the battery all the time, or use AC all the time, and use the batter once a week or once a month, as Apple recommends?
Its not full charging that is damaging, but 1. parasitic charging, and 2. ALWAYS fully charged.
Your "either or" premise is wrong on both counts, see above.
In a lithium battery, deep discharges alter the chemistry of the anode ➕ to take up lithium ions and slowly damages the batteries capacity for the cathode ➖ to transport lithium ions to the anode when charging, thereby reducing max charge levels in mAh. In short, radical swings of power to lithium cells disrupts the chemical ecosystem of the battery to hold charges correctly which likewise impedes the perfect transfer of lithium ions both in charging and discharging. In charging your lithium battery, lithium ions are “pushed uphill” (hard) to the anode, and discharged “downhill” (easy) to the cathode when on battery power. Deep discharges, damages this “upward” electrolyte chemistry for the battery to maintain a healthy charge and discharge balance relative to its age and cycles.
From BASF: How Lithium Batteries work
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2PjyJhe7Q1g
.*You don’t want your Macbook both always plugged in AND in sleep mode (When portable devices are charging and in the on or sleep position, the current that is drawn through the device is called the parasitic load and will alter the dynamics of charge cycle. Battery manufacturers advise against parasitic loading because it induces mini-cycles.)
Keeping batteries connected to a charger ensures that periodic "top-ups" do very minor but continuous damage to individual cells, hence Apples recommendation above: “Apple does not recommend leaving your portable plugged in all the time”, …this is because “Li-ion degrades fastest at high state-of-charge”.
This is also the same reason new Apple notebooks are packaged with 50% charges and not 100%.