Q: How can I update Apple product? There is no update icon that I can click

Plug it in to iTunes. On the Device Summary screen is an option to update. Be aware that this involves a large download.

Settings > General > Software Update, unless you have lower iOS than 5 then you need to connect to a computer running iTunes, select the iPad from the devices listed on the left side of the window, then select Software Update in the main, Summary window.